Calling It Quits

Interesting........


There you are, in this great relationship. Everything is going well. You like all the same things, and it seems you are doing everything together. Your friends like his friends, his friends like your friends, and you are just one of those couples that everyone adores and then, one morning you wake up and think, "I need this why?" Suddenly you feel like maybe, this isn't the way it's supposed to go, maybe it's time for this...dare I say, should be ending. How do you know when it's time to call a relationship quits and move away and on with your life.


Difficulty: Moderate
Instructions
Things You'll Need:
Honesty
Close attention to detail
quiet
time alone
some good friends
Self-truth
A way out

Step 1
Step one, ASSESS the relationship. Get to a quiet place where you can be alone without interruption by your partner and write down a pros and cons list for your relationship. I recommend destroying this list afterwards so that your partner never find it!

Step 2
Okay, you have your list of pros and cons. Next, take a page or two and write down what was so great about your relationship to begin with. What was it about that person that drove the two of you together? Was it a mutual interest like dancing, or belly shots at the bar, or tennis, or love for Asian food, what was it?

Step 3
Third. Try to figure out just what changed. What happened to make the relationship different. Perhaps in the beginning you were both into kick boxing and now he's working late every day. Maybe in the beginning you both wanted the same things and now it seems like you are going into completely different places. Or maybe you've changed. Maybe what you thought you wanted or needed from the relationship has changed. Maybe you now want more and what had started out as a simple "fling" has become something else and you want a commitment or you want to move on. How long have you been together? We all grow over time. Most couples either grow together, or grow apart. But if you find that the growing apart leaves you dreading when you are with them, maybe it's time to move on.

Step 4
Look at your relationship under a magnifying glass. Are you fighting all the time? Do you find that you/or your partner would rather spend time with their friends than with you? Are you finding fault with each other all the time? Is there or could there be another love interest? These are hard questions, believe me I know it, but you have to ask yourself these questions.

Step 5
Can you be truthful with each other? Do you communicate? How often do you talk about what is going on in your lives? Have they shut you out? Do you shut them out? How often are you intimate with each other? If you aren't having relations at least once a month, there is a problem of some sort. Are they ever tender with you any more?

Step 6
Who have you become as a result of being in this relationship? Is this WHO you are? Do you feel empty inside? Is being with this person getting in the way of who you want to be, truly be, or moreover, who you are? Have you become less of yourself so that they can be more of who they are? Are you the martyr?

Step 7
The hand you hold, maybe the hand that holds you down. If the relationship isn't working at making you a better person, or helping you to become the best you that you can be, then see it for what it is. If you face facts early on in the relationship, you can either work it out, or move on. Don't go chasing after friends. It is truly much better to be alone and happy then to be in a horrible relationship that eats at you daily and in the end sends you to an early grave.

Live, Love, and Let Go

I can't find the words to say....it is now 5:50 and approximately 20 minutes ago my bird passed away. Although I called my bird fat, and said it ate too much, and teased it when it didn't talk to me, and used to put my barbie's hand in the cage, and used to feed it cup of noodles, and used to talk on the phone in front of it, and so much more... I will miss my bird so so much....Death and losses hurt my heart.....I don't take losing people very well...its different to lose them and know they're still wandering in the world but losing them by death has to be the hardest thing ever....Only God knows how much I loved my bird and my aunt that just passed....I just prayed earlier today for God to help me with what I was going through and to give me strength....I thanked him for all the things I had, all the things I don't have, and all the things I will have in the future.....I thank God for the memories I have with my aunt and my bird that will always dwell in my heart....I honestly cannot stop crying....I stood there watching him struggle and I shut the door...(I don't take that well either)...and as soon as my uncle said "Oh No" I knew that was it....You love things so much and you want them to be there forever but sometimes they just can't.....sometimes God is doing all that he can to let you know that *as the color purple would say* "This life don't last forever, but heaven last always" So take advantage of what you have and cherish your time by creating memories with those people...or in my case people and animals.....If I could say one last thing to my bird I would say I love you so much and I'm going to miss you just as much.....

RIP Mr. Green

Just Blogging

I'm kinda bummed that I missed church today. I didn't have time to do my hair yesterday because I was too busy indulging in crab legs and shrimp. I had a wonderful 4th of July. Come to think of it...My life is wonderful. I have this wonderful internship making alot of money while learning alot in the process. I can honestly say the experience is invaluable. I'm re-acquainting myself with people I lost touch with throughout the years and making an impact on their lives and vice versa. My family and I are so close now. My niece loves me although we fight all the time with her toys, but she knows its out of love...I don't know man..I just feel blessed and highly favored....no drama no nothing....

Although I do have all of these things going well I still have continuous aspirations. I have the career, I have the grades, I have the blessing pouring in but what I want to aspire for myself is to become a free spirit. Indulging in life, what it has to offer and being open minded. I'm an observant person and I've noticed that the people that are unsuccessful (in terms of my definition of success) are the ones that don't open up their minds...those that are close-minded to the walls or environment around them and then they blame it on God not catching them a break... I believe you have to look around you to determine what is prohibiting your success or even WHO is....if you have all this drama following you why? If you can't find a career why? What are you doing to contribute towards it?

It has worked for me thus far and I'm going to keep on working at it in hope that it continue to work and God will continue to bless me. Oh well. I think Im going to read this book I just bought...until next time..

Perception

I know that some people claim that they don't care what people think about them regardless so why do you change up depending on who you're around. Having the ability to adapt is one thing but SWITCHING THE GAME UP is a whole other thing. Be yourself, but be consistent...Keep in mind what people say when they're in your face and behind your back....if you died today what would people really say about you.....keep that in mind when you carry yourself every day. I just thought about that being as though Michael Jackson was lost today.....what are people saying about him now that he's gone......what did people really think of him while he was alive....it's all so crazy to me....RIP Michael....until next time.

Be Careful

Be careful about the people who you associate with and the people you confide in. People come in and out of your life like seasons but the real ones will be there year end and year out. Been disappointed by plenty of people this year man, but I am a strong woman. I hate when you confide in someone in someone that is supposed to be your friend and when a discussion arises they take it personal and rub it back in your face. I think that is so petty beyond belief. I hate when people stop talking to you over petty stuff and call everyone their best friend that they're not. People are completely flawed with not identifying who they are and what they stand for...and if you stand for nothing you will fall for anything...where are some real intelligent open minded people out here that aren't with all this shiesty mess going on....anywho enough with the drama....time for fun. Until next time.

[J]

OMG

So I've been watching B Scott's video for years. I practically love him. Not only is he inspiring, but he is so dag on funny!!! I was waiting on him to comment on this video and he did!!!!! I feel like it's christmas! The sims 3 comes out tomorrow.....OMG (too excited) Well onto continuing to lay in my bed until i feel like getting up to do some spring cleaning.

Been Gone For A Minute....

yeah so i guess we have a lot of catching up to do.. i've been spending the last couple of months analyzing and re-analyzing my life. i've made a lot of decisions...and changed my mind on almost all of em lol.....I DECIDED TO JOIN THE AIR FORCE! and i'm ridiculously excited about it...everybody keeps asking me why i'm joining..and its a lot. i've been out of high school for 3 years and i just feel like theres so much more i can be doing with my life. i know its not going to be easy...but the things that are worth it usually aren't...which leads to my next topic...my love life has been up & down the past couple weeks or so... we're both just trying to figure out why things arent like they were...or why they arent like we feel they should be after 2 years. i've been trying to figure out if it was worth trying anymore..and if i should just walk away..but no matter how hard i try to...i just cant...and its been the same for him...but the fact that we tried to walk away from each other bothers me..but maybe it shouldnt...i mean...we're still here right?? UGH! work! i'm convinced that mimi's is going to work me to death lol. 40 hr weeks are NO joke when u work in a restaurant. theres  no desk to sit at..and u have to deal with people and their bs....but i'm making BANK though!!!! soooo....y complain?? i've been dealing with home issues a lot lately too...and i've been thinking about moving...even transfered jobs..but i've come to realize that my biggest problem is that there is only one stable thing about me...the fact that i ALWAYS run when i dont want to deal with things..and usually i end up in a more ridiculous situation than i was in...so i decided to stick it out..stop running..and oh idk GROW THE HELL UP!! lls (yeah i just went on myself a lil bit) well i guess thats it...B IS STILL A FOOLYWANG. THAT WONT EVER CHANGE. until next time people..promise it wont be so long..

{C}

A pack of hair is all I ever wanted! + IT

WTF is what you're probably thinking. But that's what I was thinking when this hot ass chick Myamee wins "I Love Money 2", and cries as she says "Now I can buy all the packs of hair I want." HHMMMM! Well I don't know about ANYBODY else, but that aint what anybody should be thinking of. Once again we go on TV and give them something to talk about. Never ceases to amaze me at the things we do and say. I know we can't categorize everyone for her ignorant comment, but it needs to change!! Whatever happened to paying off your bills, or even investing in a home. Maybe she has all she needs, ,IDK! Just thought I was the only one to catch that and I wanted to bring it to the forefront!

IT has issues. That's all I'm going to say about IT!

Anger has been getting the best of me

Psalms 37: 8 says Cease from anger and forsake wrath;fret not yourself-it tends only evildoing. For evildooers shall be cut off, but those who wait and hope and look for the Lord [in the end] shall inherit the earth.

I will think of this every time I become angry with what is going on my life I need to think about this. I've went through so much this week alone and I've had mixed feelings about so many things going on with school and home. My frustrations have been gradually coming out but they came out in a way in which I thought I would never have to be brought to. I need to stop dwelling on how other people think about what I should be doing and focus on how I'm doing it. Apparently I'm not doing something right in their eyes if they coming at my head in an ignorant way about it so it is what it is. I declare to myself through blogging that I will let go of this anger because it takes energy to be angry with someone. It doesn't take any energy to be indifferent and thats what I choose to be. The semester is almost over NO MORE 8 Oclock classes....Life will get Better

I declare, God that the fountain of Life is with you, in Your light, I see light [Amen] Good night...

[j]

People

I encourage people to try and gain perspective...and this can only be done by stepping out of your comfort zone and gaining experience and not being subject to what is placed in front of you but what is in between the lines....*shrugs*

[J]

I GUESS you wanna STD...and thats FINE!

LMAO @ DUMB ASS FEMALES....

Scenario: One of my ex-good friends was talking to this dude for a while. She was telling me about dude and all this extra geeking shit. Whole time she's telling me about this dude, I been feeling like I know him and the things she saying is all too close to the dude that I know. She was calling him by a shortened name (nickname) or whatever that made me think it wasn't the same dude I knew. So one day she's doing my hair and she's telling me more and more about this dude to the point where I know that it's the same nigga. Different name or not. So right in the middle of her talking I'm like "That nigga has a girlfriend." She's like "why you say that." I'm like because his stepmother and my mother are friends. And so I start telling her about him and she's like shocked! I'm like leave nigga alone. She called dude and asked him about it and all this extra geekin shit. Ok, they talk...blah...blah....blah. I assume from that day they weren't going to talk. (This summer 07)

OK.....so they continue talking to NOW (Spring 09). I find out that she could possibly have an STD from this very dude. Now my source who told me advised me to tell my friend she could have it. I wasn't even going to tell the girl bcuz she been dumb since jump with messin with dude knowing he has a girl. My source said you really should that's your friend. I'm like ur right, and I tell her...........

Check this B.S: I tell my friend that she could have an STD from dude and she's like I got checked in like Jan or Feb, and I'm good. She said they werent even fucking anymore, cuz I asked!! So some hours later she had the NERVE, the audacity to call me and say that DUDE is outside my house and told her to tell me to come outside. I'm like...I hope you joking. You sending dude to my house. Oh yea......that's how we rockin???? Thought I was helping a friend out.....guess not....DAMN!!!!!!

{ B }

I need Prayer ya'll

First,  PRAY I GET A JOB IN A WEEK TOPS!!!......

Well I'm blown that I do not have a job because i NEED one.  It's just this simple.  I can't take staying at home and not doing anything with my life at all.  Then I have school starting on june 1st.  I actually can't wait for that.  It just made me feel better about a lot of ish.  Then my master mother keeps asking me what's going on and I'm like...ARRGHHH!  I know more than you I have bills to pay.  Leave me alone chick!  Love her though.  At the moment what would make me happy is some sour patch kids and some soda.  I don't feel like going to get either.  I guess I can wait until tomorrow.

Whats really good with C??

Remember that life is way too short.  You have to seize the moment now, because you might get seized in the moment.  And let's go out with no regrets, no guilt or shame!  If you feel a sense of those things, you make room to improve.  Lesson Learned.  Take it with a grain a salt.  Keep it movin!  Do it all again.  As long as you live.  Because that's life.  And we only got one to live!  

{ B }

LOL @ Everything in this F*(&ing world + a BUNCH of Randomness...Enjoy

>I'm just laughing @ everything first off!

>Lets get the randomness started...to make me feel better about myself!!!!

First...uhhhhhhhh...Cassie, Britney Spears CANT be your role model

So ASSie Cassie decided it would be a good idea to chop...not all...but only one half of her head off.  I personally don't get it.  But seeing it I think she could maybe rock a bomb short cut....not like she has anything better to do.....

womp....

>Somehow my credit card info got into a porn addicts hands....cuz they bought $80 worth.  Who steals a credit card for porn??...

>I still need a JOB!

{ B }

Hip Hop Flight Attendant

So today I'm upset because I forgot I'm getting inducted into Golden Key International Honour Society. I also found out some information about this organization I want to join that I didn't find very welcoming. But anywho onto the video [relaxing before induction] [J]

First and Foremost I woke up this morning feeling like....[UGH]...I woke up thinking about so many things in my brain.....Last night I was reading Madea's book "Dont make a black woman take off her earrings" it was ok...must've not been that great if i fell asleep on it. So I'm supposed to be at HU Beautification Day, but I'm just not into that...at least not today when I want to relax and relax my hair.... I LOVE B SCOTT: He makes me laugh soooooo hard... anyway



I was looking at other people's blogs thinking maybe I gotta things up Like this Video:






when did Halle berry learn how to walk it out....or I didn't know she had to look urban to do her own dance that everyone made up.....OH WELL....Onto this take-home test and relaxing....until next time...

Nightcap tidbits!

Wow...I'm sleepy. I went to my old high school today and that was pretty fun. I saw 2 teachers that I used to have and conversed with them for a while. I also decided I'm gonna be graduating from Howard. That's a good look right there. You know it's the real HU! In case you ever hear about the real HU....make sure its Howrd. Some other schools try to say they're the real HU. Played a trick on C bc she's ridic and doesn't blog. Its april fools day and I told her my car was set on fire. Such a great person that she went for it. >:O●H.Α.●:-D:-DHΑHΑHΑ●HΑ:'( .● .....fun times!!


{ B }

mmmmhm.....so I have a twitter! + AMERICAN IDOL!

So i am now guilty of getting on this new crave called Twitter!! I know you all have heard about Twitter and everyone having one. it's pretty cool and celebs have them and they actually are probably doing their own updates b/c that's all you have to do. The site only allows you to get updates from people. That's all they can do as well. IDK! It's much more simple than facebook. I'm not a complex person and facebook and myspace are adding 9832748327 features that makes their sites complicated and annoying to me. I like user friendly AND simple. Hope everyone gets a twitter and follows me.

P.S.
www.twitter.com/bmillionaiire

So American Idol is on and sometimes people pick the dumbest songs. One little rocker hippie-ish chick sang Bob Marley 'Turn your lights down low." I'm like you don't even look like you would know that song let a lone sing it. Of course the judges chewed her out. Well deserved. She was ridiculous for singing that song. They have a blond guy this season who's actually pretty good. Better than a lot of the contestants. Simon is hilarious, and Paula is still.............mmmhm. Randy can't seem to get the word "dog" out of his vocab and I'm still not sure who this new judge is and how she's qualified for this!

Just some ish I wanted to talk about today.....

{ B }

I am so irritated right now

You can't depend on anyone but yourself...I need to learn how to take hold of my own....F*#$...TBC [J]

I am becoming so irritable.....call me a hypocrite if you want but i am so tired of my roommate on the phone with her boyfriend. If this keeps going on I think i'm going to have to move out. I know she hears me turning the TV up because i dont wanna hear that shit.....*excuse my french* I don't want to live with her anymore GOD KNOWS. I am just sick and tired of her.....her affirmations and her insecurities.....FOLLOWERS you know a woman is insecure when she goes out of her way to put down other women and needs confirmation from other people. Why do you need someone to tell you that a girl is ugly. Or why do you need your boyfriend who claims he loves you more or loves you the most *based on what i hear* to confirm that he doesnt like sloppy girls? she just annoys me....like why are your showers 5 minutes....and why doesnt your hair move...LOL Sorry i wa s having a moment...but i'm fine anyway......I'm sitting on the phone while marcus is snoring thinking about reading this book to sleep. The TV is extra loud i can't even think but it drowns her out so thats fine. I just finished watching sex and the city twice. I love that movie so much. I wish i had friends like that and a temporary life like that. Just me and my girls and dispensable income LOL . I am so thirsty wondering where B and C are....oh well I guess this means Good night (Reading Attitude 101)

[j]